Ridiculous Infomercial of the Day: Bottle Top

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Coca-Cola Can

Screenshot / YouTube.com

The soda can is one phone call away from extinction.

Let’s face it — a 12-ounce Diet Coke is a 21st-century inconvenience. The threat of a bug crawling in your drink makes it time to commit to a new beverage holder — the bottle. And that’s where the Bottle Top comes in handy. It’s a plastic contraption that — you guessed it — converts any can into a bottle.

The Bottle Top is a beacon of simplicity. Just pop it on top of any can and presto, it’s now a bottle! And yes, five minutes later, your 6-year-old child can recognize that same simplicity and take the cap right off.

Bottle Top also serves as an ideal assistant for any romantic date in the park, as it comes in several different colors. What better conversation starter is there on that picnic than “Wait, you’re yellow right? No I’m blue. Huh…guess that’s your drink. No worries, at least I haven’t spilled yet. And plus, we totally saved 65 cents apiece by not purchasing that 20-ounce bottle at that five-star corner deli. I don’t know about you, but my 401k is set to skyrocket.”

Cost: Two sets of six bottle tops, plus the bottle top tab lifter, for $20 (plus $6.99 shipping & handling)

Claim: “Bottle Tops help you get more for you money as they help keep your canned beverages cool, carbonated AND prevent spills.”

Concerns: Post your comments below.

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