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In light of Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren’s divorce officially going through, NewsFeed thinks it’d be nice if Tiger dropped the whole straight-laced-golfer façade and just embraced the bad-boy image, once and for all. Might we suggest a full-body tattoo?
Tiger has already been criticized for using choice language on the course and he’s promised to try and tone it down. We suggest a completely opposite route. Tiger, you’re halfway there; embrace your inner McEnroe and unleash all of that pent up rage.
Sure, Jupiter Island, Florida is beautiful with its sunshine and rich people, but it doesn’t exactly spell party, does it? Jersey Shore, on the other hand, definitely spells out party and, on a practical note, it’s close to Pine Valley Golf Club, which Golf Magazine rated the best golf course in the U.S.
If clothes make the man, than what does that make Tiger? Boring, that’s what. He needs to lose the polos and sweater vests and invest in some oversize jerseys and also forgo daily showers. Now that’s bad-boy!
Ok, so Nike is a pretty sweet sponsor and it was really great of them to weather out that whole media storm debacle. But, John Daly was sponsored by Hooters and quite frankly, it just doesn’t get much more bad-boy (or sleazy) than that.
Some people think that who you roll with says a lot about your character. In other words, Tiger’s gotta lose the caddy! Steve Williams is far too straight-laced for his new image. A better choice? We suggest getting the party started with Cheech.
If you’re not a super-fan, golf can be, well, sorta boring. Why not liven things up with a keg stand at the halfway mark? It’ll give Tiger’s new fans something to cheer for. Bonus: the alcohol might help to fuel a few extra McEnroe-inspired outbursts. Hiyo!
Ah, street racing. What recreational pastime could better show off a reckless disregard for safety and a willingness to drop loads of money on unnecessary, tricked out cars? The epitome of a bad-boy hobby; because, let’s face it, something has to mitigate all that golfing.
Nothing, and we mean nothing, says bad-boy like a tattoo. But not just any tattoo will suffice; Tiger needs to go big. We suggest a giant phoenix, to symbolize Tiger rising above the fire of controversy, more powerful than before. Yeah, that’s right. Tough and profound.
Dario Franchitti from Spain was the first to the finish line at the Indy 500 on Sunday, winning his third title after taking control of the course in the final lap
Yes, Internet, we’ve seen it before — but this unexpected routine is as charming as it gets.
