Pope’s Got Talent: Papal Warm-Up Act in Scotland is Susan Boyle

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Scottish singer Susan Boyle performs at Bellahouston Park, before the arrival of Pope Benedict XVI, in Glasgow September 16, 2010. Pope Benedict arrived in Britain on Thursday hoping to win over one of Europe's most secular countries, but a last minute diplomatic hiccup and the possibility of a low turnout threaten the success of the visit. RETUERS/Phil Noble (BRITAIN - Tags: ENTERTAINMENT POLITICS SOCIETY PROFILE RELIGION)

Live Aid. Woodstock. SuBo. For we must now add the Thursday September 16 concert of Scotland’s very own Susan Boyle warming up the crowd for the Pope’s open air Mass in Glasgow to the greatest musical events of all time.

It was originally thought that the reality TV star was actually going to be singing in front of the Pontiff. But because this was considered a pop cultural moment so wild it would blow the world’s collective mind*, Boyle simply acted as Pope Benedict’s opening act at Bellahouston Park in Glasgow with a triple whammy of “I Dreamed A Dream” and traditional hymns “How Great Thou Art” and “Make Me A Channel Of Your Peace.” They were all sung, of course, perfectly and brought tears to everyone’s eyes.

And don’t go thinking that she might have been ever so slightly intimidated by the occasion: Boyle told the BBC, “I’d like to think I am making the day extra special for them.” That’s right people, the first Papal visit to the U.K. since 1982 is not and never was about the Pope. Instead, we’re left with proof positive that this is now Susan Boyle’s world and we simply live in it. But who’s going to tell SuBo that the Pope didn’t vote for her on Britain’s Got Talent?

* This might not strictly be true.