Reading While Eating for January 5: Big Bands and Little Kids

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Wednesday’s links don’t get the joke.

Not Funny: Why did terrible movies get nominated for Best Comedy Golden Globes? Because foreign markets don’t “get” American comedies, and that does not bode well for the movie industry. (The Atlantic)

Downward Spiral: We always hear about America’s decline as a superpower. But here’s why it’s a real threat this time. (Foreign Policy)

Ghostwriting Gal: It’s obvious that Snooki didn’t write her new “novel,” A Shore Thing. Learn more about the Jersey-bred woman who did. (Slate)

Super Starlets: Look more culturally literate than you actually are by seeing the biggest rising stars of 2011. You can say you knew them when. (EW)

Little Leaders: Yes, American presidents get a great house and lots of power. But their baby pictures also end up all over the Internet. (LIFE)

Mock Music: This montage of fake bands in movies is a sad reminder that fictional bands can often be better than most real ones. (The Daily What)

Elsewhere on TIME.com: Ready to get healthy for the new year? Medical guru Dr. Oz gives you 5 New Year’s resolutions on Healthland.

Must See: After an animation of him crying on Dawson’s Creek went viral, actor James Van Der Beek gave the Internet what it wanted: more. (via Urlesque)