Watch: Ex-Barista’s Starbucks Rant Song Got Him Fired

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Christopher Cristwell was axed by the coffee giant after he penned and performed a song that mocked the customers he had to put up with.

Cristwell, 25, told the Boston Herald that the song was a way to “break the tension” after a stressful day at work. The lyrics are clearly meant to be funny and seem to have struck a chord with other baristas, judging from comments on YouTube and Starbucks Gossip. But the song is also mean-spirited, and it’s not difficult to understand why Starbucks needed to fire him.

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The song is riddled with profanity, racial and other stereotypes about customers, and unkind words aimed at coworkers. He vents his annoyance over rich white ladies who all want skinny vanilla lattes. To the customer who brings noisy children, he croons, “I just want to draw a middle finger on your cup.” And, with a wink, he sings about sneaking fresh decaf (gasp!) into a “grande chip” when the coffee runs out.

He ends the song by saying he’s “had it up to here” and “might defect to Pete’s.” Harsh.

The video went viral among company employees. Human resources had a chat with Cristwell, who is also taking classes to become an emergency medical technician. A week later, he was fired during his shift. It just doesn’t seem like he’ll mind too much. (via Starbucks Gossip)

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1 comments
JengerStreak
JengerStreak

Just so you know, it's a grande "drip" not "chip" which means just a regular pour of brewed coffee. Also, all the unkind words were aimed toward the customers and not toward the coworkers themselves. Your reaction to this song makes me believe you're one of these customers he's calling out.