Some days you just want a darn hamburger. So you barge into a Denny’s, announce that you’re the new manager, and fix yourself a burger. While perhaps understandable in modern day, a-man’s-gotta-eat, Les Miserables sort of way, it’s not quite up to the level of behavior we expect from other members of society. And yet that’s exactly what a Wisconsin man did, according to the Associated Press.
Wearing a tie and trenchcoat and carrying a briefcase, James Summers walked into a Madison, Wis. Denny’s restaurant, headed into the back office and introduced himself as the new general manager. The manager on duty, Tracy Brant, didn’t believe his story, and suggested that perhaps he had the wrong restaurant, but Summers insisted he was in the correct place. As Brant tried to confirm the new hire with Denny’s regional headquarters, Summers showed himself into the kitchen and fixed up a meal of burgers and fries.
Summers was in the middle of lunch when Brant reported that Denny’s had confirmed that he did not work there. Summers, who could not pay for his meal, left the restaurant as Brant dialed 911. Police apprehended him in the parking lot. ”This is why you don’t dine and dash, kiddies,” Summers yelled out to diners as officers took him away, police said in a release. Hopefully the judge will take that anti-crime PSA into consideration when weighing a sentence for the man. Unfortunately, the briefcase Summers was carrying was filled with crack pipes and a stun gun was found holstered under his trenchcoat, so leniency from the courts is unlikely.
He’s since been charged with disorderly conduct and possession of drug paraphernalia, and felony possession of an electronic weapon. Summers is due back in court March 6 for a preliminary hearing.