What Your Dog Says About Your Sex Life

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A man plays with a dog in Alamo Square Park in San Francisco with the city as a backdrop.

Are you a chihuahua person or a golden retriever fan? Think carefully — your answer could affect your next date.

Klooff, an iPhone app for pet lovers, surveyed its users to find out what your dog says about you to a potential date. Or, as the company asks in a pun-heavy press release, “what dog breeds give men and women the best chance of getting a ‘leg up’ on the competition in the ‘dog eat dog’ world of dating and romance?”

According to the fairly unscientific data (the site claims its data is based on a survey that’s  “representative of” 1,000 pet owners and non-owners) the top 5 breeds for women hoping to attract men are Golden Retrievers, Labrador Retrievers, Chihuahuas, Poodles and Beagles.  Men love retriever breeds, the company says, and will ideally adore a woman caring for one.  But women who own Chihuahuas, according to respondents, are most likely to be “hot” and “dumb” (read: guys aren’t going to be thinking about a long-term relationship here).

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Poodle owners shouldn’t get too comfortable either, however, as men find women with a Poodle or a Chihuahua likely to be “high maintenance” as well.

As for guys with dogs, women most like men with German Shepherds, Golden Retrievers, Labrador Retrievers, Siberian Huskies and French Bulldogs. Men with German Shepherds and retriever breeds are seen as “great dad” material and owning a husky is certainly “manly.”

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But Bulldogs, Boxers and Rottweilers put guys squarely in Chihuahua territory: women view men with these breeds as less than brilliant. In fact, people see men owning a Golden Retriever as 10 times more likely to be “marriage material” than one owning a Pit Bull. Pit Bull owners are also 10 times more likely to be considered “slimy” or “sketchy” than someone who owns a Siberian Husky. Hey, at least now you know what other people are thinking. We never said it would make you feel good.

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