[youtube=http://youtu.be/IDXuNJx9t3o]
TIME columnist Joel Stein appeared on Conan Monday night to discuss his new book, Man Made: A Stupid Quest for Masculinity and all the things he did as gimmicks for the book. Above, watch him say what he really thinks about turkeys and get out-switchbladed by Conan.
Stein told us the day after the interview that he regrets the half-hug he gave to co-guest Mila Kunis:
I didn’t know how to greet her because normally if you share furniture with someone like at a movie theater or a bus stop, you don’t have to greet each other. And plus, she’s pretty, and so I didn’t want to be like lecherous. I didn’t know whether to hug or to shake her hand. So I did this very manly half-hug that I regret. My brain was like, ‘oh, you have to hug, but don’t do too much of a hug.’ I’m still not sure what the right thing to do was, but it was either a handshake or a full hug. You gotta commit. I think the handshake would have been best. For sure. Yeah, the hug was a bad idea. So if you are on a talk show, and they keep an attractive actress on the couch with you, handshake.
His advice for TIME readers: “If you are on a talk show, and they keep an attractive actress on the couch with you—handshake.”
Stein was also pleased that his appearance—and the switchblade stunts that Conan used to out-do him—will leave a permanent memory. “There’s going to be a permanent scar in his desk from my appearance,” Stein said. “I like how he’ll occasionally look down at the nick in his desk and think, ‘oh, yes, that’s when that guy whose name I don’t remember was here.’”