Reading While Eating for Aug. 17: Rage and Sorrow

In today's must-read links for your lunch break: A heavy metal feud, a Chinese orgy and the saddest, sweetest, best wedding announcement ever.

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Siphiwe Sibeko/Reuters

A protester licks his spear outside the Lonmin platinum mine in Rustenburg, South Africa, August 16, 2012. South African police opened fire on Thursday against thousands of striking miners, armed with machetes and sticks, leaving more than 30 dead.

The Saddest, Sweetest, Best ‘Vows’ Column Ever: No snarking this time. Do yourself a favor and get tissues. (The New York Times)

Rage Against the Veep Pick: Rage Against the Machine guitarist Tom Morello has a few choice words for RATM fan Paul Ryan. (Rolling Stone)

Headline of the Day: Evan Osnos’ “This Is Awkward: The Politics of a Chinese Orgy”. There. (The New Yorker)

Barack Obama Has Just About Had It With You People: The 7 most inane questions the President has actually had to answer. (BuzzFeed)

Welcome to Skateistan: Check out this video about the NGO that’s teaching Afghan girls to shred. (Divanee)

Bai Ling, Never Change: For fans of the eternally fashion-forward actress, this is about as Bai Ling as it gets. Applause. (Go Fug Yourself)

Stay Back: 7 absolutely insane animal defense mechanisms, like shooting blood out of your eyeballs. Hey, it’d keep us away. (Mental Floss)

And With That, It’s the Weekend. Here’s Antoine “Bed Intruder” Dodson on the Chick-Fil-A controversy. (Viral Viral Videos)