A mural of Pinocchio is pictured in front of a street light at Lansdowne Park in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada November 14, 2012.
Secessionists, Unite! More than half a million people from all 50 states have signed on to the White House petition site We The People in order to demand that their state be allowed to secede from the union following Obama’s reelection. Of course, others are just looking out for Alderaan. (TIME.com)
$4.5 Billion for Gulf Oil Spill. BP has agreed to pay a massive $4.5 billion fine and plead guilty to criminal charges related to the Deepwater Horizon drilling rig explosion and subsequent oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico. (NBC News)
The ‘Gifts’ that Keep on Giving? Former GOP candidate Mitt Romney told donors that Obama had won reelection by giving ‘gifts’ to black voters, Latinos and women — a statement that angered certain members of his party. Figures, the President only got us new socks this year. Again. (Washington Post)
All-TIME Top 100 Video Games: We were surprised at how many of these we’ve actually played. (TIME.com)
Inside the Life of a Porn Star Agent. What, because there wasn’t enough nudity in Entourage? (The Hollywood Review)
It’s a Bird! It’s a Plane! A Denver news crew set out to debunk a local man’s UFO claims, but ended up supporting them instead. (Gawker)
5 Hour Energy Can Kill You. The energy drink has been cited in 90 FDA filings, including several that cited heart attacks and one of “spontaneous abortion.” Back to Red Bull and amphetamines for us. (Yahoo! News)
Now Read This. Ladies and Gentlemen, your 2012 National Book Award Winners. (Flavorwire)
The Loneliest Planet: Meet CFBDSIR2149, a planet four times the size of Jupiter, which floats aimlessly in space, without a star system to call its own. (Mental Floss)
Robofish: The ideal pet for the laziest pet-owners in the world. We can’t wait to get one. (Cheezburger)