Someone Is Kidnapping and Eating Britain’s Swans

Majestic swans are disappearing from a historic British waterway, and detectives suspect that they are being stolen for food.

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Swans have been going missing in Lincoln, UK.

Majestic swans are disappearing from a historic British waterway, and detectives suspect that they are being stolen for food.

Witnesses told investigating officers that they saw a gang of five men attacking one of the snowy white birds with a nail-studded implement, according to a report in the UK’s The Daily Telegraph. And now a police team is probing whether four similar incidents are in fact linked, and the disappearances part of a larger conspiracy.

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“The remains of five birds have been found. The evidence we have is that there is little left of the bodies and for the want of better words one of the birds was found in a bag done up like a turkey,” Police Constable Nick Willey told the London-based newspaper.

“Swans, like any wild bird, are protected by law so this is not only very cruel, but it’s also illegal.”

The first remains of a swan turned up on parkland by a Roman waterway in historic Lincoln, Lincolnshire, on Dec. 13, with further body parts reported just before Christmas and three more carcasses appearing thereafter.

Lincoln’s RSPCA branch is also investigating the case, according to local paper the Linconite, while residents have also created a Facebook page to collect information on any suspicious fatality. The city’s swans are iconic due to their centuries-old residence at Brayford Pool and surrounding rivers.

What’s more, due to a historic covenant dating back until at least 1186, all wild swans inhabiting open water in the UK belong to the queen — meaning that the perpetrators could even face a treason charge over their birdnapping.

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23 comments
EdieKoller
EdieKoller

I know I know I am suppose to joke about it...ha ha ha ha chuckle chuckle...well I have a great sense of humor but this one is not really funny to me;P

EdieKoller
EdieKoller

Maybe they are making "SWAN"son' frozen dinnerw with them.  Sorry...I think its disgusting.. Is there such a food shortage in England that the influx of foreign people are so underfed...that they have to resort to eating swans...  Guess it will be Englands Final "swan song"

alkoholik
alkoholik

What kind of wine goes with swan?

JerryCampbell
JerryCampbell

@alkoholik The one made from your own blood. Now, don't be disgusted. You gotta make some sacrifice if you want to eat those tasty swines. Try it and report the results back.

JDJDJD
JDJDJD

Just replace the word chicken with swan.  Finger licking good!  Yum!

Ingredients:
 4 chicken breasts, with bone and skin
1/4 cup butter, melted
1 -2 teaspoon Season-All salt (I use McCormick's)

Directions:

1 Preheat oven to 400°F.
2 Spray a shallow baking dish with non-stick cooking spray.
3 Rinse chicken breast under cool running water.
4 Pat chicken dry with paper towels.
5 Place chicken in dish.
6 Brush the melted butter over the chicken, using all the butter.
7 Sprinkle with seasoned salt.
8 Bake for 50-60 minutes or until cooked through.
9 ~NOTE~Chicken takes only 50 minutes in my oven.
10 Don't over cook, as they might turn out tough.

enochroot1
enochroot1

Oh, they belong to the queen too? What has she given the people aside from halitosis? 

tricky
tricky

England is full of people who eta anything that moves and we know who they are?

mellowyustard
mellowyustard like.author.displayName 1 Like

Can I just make one brief correction here? "Kidnapping" applies to humans. I think the better word to use here is "stealing." 


JerryCampbell
JerryCampbell

@mellowyustard lol, you think you are special and you are the only one entitled to "kidnapping". Poor swans can also be kidnapped by the majestic humans.

MikeScott
MikeScott

Oh my!  Bloody poor swans!  I guess they will have to re-write Twelve Days of Christmas.

cdnshark
cdnshark

Prince Philip is on the loose again!

FredNesbitt
FredNesbitt

Call Holmes, I suspect foul play! "Holmes, how did you deduce he had been at the Thames?" "Elementary Watson, he had foi gras on his breath."

CodeAmber
CodeAmber

Teach a man to fish...  Or, everybody gotta eat, eh?

SeymourHolz
SeymourHolz

Mr Campbell seems confused about the meaning of the word 'kidnapping'.

OffendedMan
OffendedMan

Let me guess how this will go:

1) The group will be caught and they will be, ahem, "non-indigenous" ethnic minorities.

2) They will protest that this is "part of their culture."

3) Because of (1) and (2), all charges will quietly be dropped.

pendragon05
pendragon05 like.author.displayName 1 Like

I hope they catch whoever is doing this - swans are such beautiful birds