This Site Will Tell You What Beyoncé Song to Listen to Based On Your Mood

Help me Beyoncé, you're my only hope!

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Kevin Mazur / WireImage

Singer Beyonce performs during the Pepsi Super Bowl XLVII Halftime Show at Mercedes-Benz Superdome on February 3, 2013 in New Orleans, Louisiana.

Back in the day, when Romans or tweed-sporting comp lit professors were looking for answers, they would flip open their copy of Virgil’s “The Aeneid” or “The Eclogues” to a random page, drop their finger on a passage and find just what they were looking for. Now we have Beyoncé for that.

The aptly-named site, Please Help Me Beyoncé, asks users two important questions: What mood are you in? and What’s he done now? Once you put in your answers–like you’re feeling “So Fierce” and “He Cheated On Me”– the site then sifts through Queen Bey’s rapidly-expanding musical catalogue of music and finds just the right song for you. For example, if you’re feeling “Too Booytlicious For You To Handle” and he’s “Made Eye Contact From Across The Room” you get “Check On It,” which is, of course, perfect:

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It seems our obsession with half naked dancing stars is becoming the same as it was during the Roman times..........

Mark 6:20-26.........

20 for Herod respected John; and knowing that he was a good and holy man, he protected him. Herod was greatly disturbed whenever he talked with John, but even so, he liked to listen to him.

21 Herodias’s chance finally came on Herod’s birthday. He gave a party for his high government officials, army officers, and the leading citizens of Galilee. 22 Then his daughter, also named Herodias, came in and performed a dance that greatly pleased Herod and his guests. “Ask me for anything you like,” the king said to the girl, “and I will give it to you.” 23 He even vowed, “I will give you whatever you ask, up to half my kingdom!”

24 She went out and asked her mother, “What should I ask for?”

Her mother told her, “Ask for the head of John the Baptist!”

25 So the girl hurried back to the king and told him, “I want the head of John the Baptist, right now, on a tray!”

26 Then the king deeply regretted what he had said; but because of the vows he had made in front of his guests, he couldn’t refuse her.


No thanks, I prefer high class.