Back in the day, when Romans or tweed-sporting comp lit professors were looking for answers, they would flip open their copy of Virgil’s “The Aeneid” or “The Eclogues” to a random page, drop their finger on a passage and find just what they were looking for. Now we have Beyoncé for that.
The aptly-named site, Please Help Me Beyoncé, asks users two important questions: What mood are you in? and What’s he done now? Once you put in your answers–like you’re feeling “So Fierce” and “He Cheated On Me”– the site then sifts through Queen Bey’s rapidly-expanding musical catalogue of music and finds just the right song for you. For example, if you’re feeling “Too Booytlicious For You To Handle” and he’s “Made Eye Contact From Across The Room” you get “Check On It,” which is, of course, perfect: