Financially #Winning: Charlie Sheen’s Live Shows Sell Out in Minutes

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Rick Wilking / Reuters

NewsFeed’s pretty tired of hearing about Charlie Sheen. But apparently, folks in Chicago and Detroit were interested enough to sell out Sheen’s “My Violent Torpedo of Truth/Defeat Is Not an Option” tour within minutes of tickets going on sale last Saturday morning.

The live gigs take place on April 2 and 3 in the Motor and Windy Cities respectively. But it’s not clear what it will be about. Sheen himself wrote a partial explanation of the show on Ticketmaster’s website, but left it unclear as to exactly why he’s doing it.

“My Violent Torpedo of Truth/Defeat is Not An Option Show is coming for you. I’m going on the road. LIVE. Will there be surprises? Will there be guests? Will there be mayhem? Will you ask questions? Will you laugh? Will you scream? Will you know the truth? WILL THERE BE MORE?!?! This IS where you will hear the REAL story from the Warlock. Bring it I dare you to keep up with me.”

There’s something strangely Andy Kaufmanesque about the whole thing, but it is unclear whether or not Sheen will treat his audiences to milk and cookies after the show.

(More on TIME.com: See the top 10 celebrity meltdowns)