FDA Ruins Everything by Saying Super Crispy French Fries Could Cause Cancer

Well this is terrible Monday news.

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French fries

Were you having a good day? No longer!

The FDA announced that the crispy french fries you love so much could contain acrylamide, a carcinogen that’s known to cause cancer in animals. While the limp, pale fries no one wants are in the clear, well-done fries are reportedly to be avoided.

Although browned fries aren’t about to get banned à la trans fats, the FDA did release a report encouraging food makers to err on the side of pale:

Cook cut potato products such as frozen french fries to a golden yellow color rather than a brown color. Brown areas tend to contain more acrylamide.

The same goes for toast and coffee.

But don’t get too worried.

Dr. and chef John LaPuma told the WSJ that the “amount of acrylamide you need to cause cancer in people is astronomical.”

We’re going to go stress eat half-frozen reject fries now.