Loser Sloth Would Rather Hang Out in Trees Than Have Sex

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Martin Harvey / Corbis

Hey everybody, a sloth in the London Zoo doesn’t want to mate. Let’s all stare at him!

Zoo officials are reportedly apprehensive about the performance anxiety of their 25-year-old two-toed sloth Prince, who has shared a rainforest exhibit with a fetching female sloth called Marilyn for four months without attempting to impregnate her. Zookeepers are encouraging him to just get out there and meet people by leaving herb treats around his habitat, and presumably also telling him he’s a catch that any girl sloth would be lucky to have.

Prince previously shared his space with a sloth named Sheila, who turned out to be a male.

The keepers have ulterior motives behind trying to hook their sloth up. They’ve always wanted to raise a baby two-toed sloth, and they’re not getting any younger.

“It would be amazing if we were to have a two-toed sloth baby at ZSL London Zoo,” senior zookeeper Lucy Hawley told the BBC. “We haven’t bred them since the 1800s so it would be a very special baby.”

Prince was not available for comment, as he was undoubtedly hanging out all by himself in a tree even though it was a Saturday night and all the other animals were going out and having loads of fun with all their friends and they would probably include him if he just asked them. (via LiveScience)

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