The cover of Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi's novel.
Aside from the fact that Snooki wrote a novel.
In yet another example that publishers will let anyone write a book, Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi, the pint-sized, self-titled “guidette” of Jersey Shore fame, has just released a novel called A Shore Thing. In a major narrative stretch for Polizzi, the plot revolves around two Italian-American young women who party in Seaside Heights, N.J. Here are the most insane things about the book’s publicity page.
(See the top 10 reality TV moments of 2010.)
- In Snooki’s world, calling someone a “gorilla” is a compliment. “Finally free of her bonehead ex-boyfriend, [Bella] left home in Brooklyn with one goal in mind: hooking up with a sexy gorilla for a no-strings-attached summer fling.”
- For some reason, MTV neglected to include fried Oreos on the first season of Jersey Shore. “[The girls] soak up all that Seaside Heights, New Jersey, has to offer: hot guidos, cool clubs, fried Oreos, and lots of tequila.”
- Snooki, on video, discusses what you were probably thinking already. “My castmates are very surprised that I’m an author, ’cause they didn’t even know that I read books. But like I said on Ellen, I can go to frickin’ Barnes and Nobles, sit down, get a coffee and read a book.”
- The novel is just another part of the Snooki empire. And it’s not going away soon. “After I’m done with Jersey Shore, I definitely want to have my own show, maybe even a talk show, definitely maybe a spinoff or something. [I] definitely want to have more books.”
- The book costs $24. Instead of lunch for the next two days (three, if you’re thrifty), consider purchasing a probably-ghostwritten novel about guidettes at the Jersey Shore. A perfectly reasonable purchasing decision.
If anything, A Shore Thing is proof that the fist-pumping guidos of Jersey Shore keep stretching their 15 minutes of fame. Pauly D has a spinoff, The Situation was on Dancing with the Stars, and Snooki is taking over the world. Aspiring novelists of the world, take note — have reality show, will get book deal.
(More on NewsFeed: Why Did Pauly D Get Jersey Shore‘s First Spinoff Show?)