What you’ll need:
- Rhinestone American flag grill (to improvise, tinfoil works well)
- Sneakers, preferably with a sticker with “Lochte” written on it attached
- Sunglasses, with catchphrase “Jeah” or overly self-promotional “Lochte” written on the lenses.
- Five faux gold medals (or real ones, if you’ve been so talented)
- Track/warmup suit
The Olympian may talk slow, but whipping up a costume to dress like him shouldn’t take long at all. Slip on some workout duds, make some DIY Lochtenation gear, and really, really, think about every word that you say, and the costume is pretty much complete. You don’t have to pee in a pool or talk about Blake Lively, but it helps if you throw a peace sign every now and then. Chiseled abs and a dreamy smile can’t hurt either, but certainly are not required.
Next Felix Baumgartner