To be fair, he also exercised every day
Ohio College Bans Fraternity After Hazing Costs Pledge a Testicle
Tyler Lawrence was struck with “a towel fashioned as a weapon”
Blaze Turns Historic Nebraska Opera House Into Icy Winter Wonder
Building froze as soon as firefighters sprayed it with water
Puppy Bowl X Lineup Revealed
Along with 39 adorable mutts and pure breeds, Animal Planet’s annual puppy bowl will feature penguin cheerleaders this year
ICYMI: Ben & Jerry’s Makes a Marijuana Joke
The week’s honorable mentions
Woman Gives Birth in Walmart Parking Lot While Husband Shops
While a man was perusing the aisles of a central Florida Walmart Thursday, his wife gave birth to their fourth child in the parking lot, much to the surprise of their three daughters in the car.
But don’t worry, it’s not like …
Men, If This Data Proves Women Hate Emoticons, Will You Finally Stop Sending Them?
Is the end of smiley faces near?
North Carolina Politician Writes Resignation Letter in Klingon
He wants to focus on a U.S. Senate bid.
What Your Dog Is Really Thinking When He Poops
He’s a compass. Sort of
This Woman Ate and Drank Nothing But Starbucks Products for an Entire Year
Also, her legal name is Beautiful Existence.
Dog Recreates Romance Scenes From All Your Favorite Movies, Makes Them 100x Better
Dirty dancing with a dog is way more impressive, anyway
This Sony Camera Commercial Is Kind of Like Gravity in Real Life
Except with less Sandra Bullock and more marketing